B's Return to Jobland

Credit: madame.de

Yes, people, this is the huge secret that I alluded to a couple of weeks ago, this is the secret that has been keeping me from "drowning in K-pop": I now have a job...again.
And before everyone gets super excited, just don't, okay? Because it's not what you think. Considering that my MA studies are slowly drawing to a close, and since I'm not entirely sure how smooth my search for work will be post-graduation, I've been applying to several part-time positions and internships and traineeships. While I had been getting the expected nos left and right...because we all know that I have about as much luck finding a job as I do a romantic partner (which I know shouldn't be super important, it would just be nice to have in my life again)...I finally managed to get accepted at a French-style bakery, which I now work at 3-4 times each week.

Here are a few things I've noticed during my first month there:

1. People are indecisive (and unprepared). - Sure, more than a few of them know exactly what they want, but I can't tell you how many times I've seen blank stares or people looking at the eclairs and macarons as if they were dealing with their own version of Sophie's Choice. Also, if you don't know what you want yet, just take a couple of steps back and signal to other customers that they can place their order before you. Otherwise, you're just holding up the line and keeping me from completing the other aspects of my job. And asking me whether or not we bake something on the premises during lunch or coffee rush isn't only piss poor timing on your part, it's also kind of rude to the other customers. Besides, I'm the late shift, I don't know what we bake and when. I'm just responsible for taking care of your caffeine and carb fix and then cleaning the whole mess up.

2. People don't know how to order. - Tying in to the previous point, and very similar to another customer service job I worked at, people (some of them at least) don't really think things through when placing orders (or line things up on the belt). I personally prefer to be as efficient as possible. When I have errands to run, I try to come up with the most logical way of tackling them, in terms of distance, importance, opening hours, whether or not food/perishables are involved, etc. Now, the average customer already knows that the best way to order at a place like a cafe or a bakery is to place the drink order first, and then to take care of any food requests. Why? Because if you're ordering something like a latte machiato, it takes a longer time for the machine to switch between dispensing hot milk and espresso than if you were to order a regular coffee or cappucino. That is time that I could easily spend grabbing you a croissant or helping you pick out the perfect assortment of macarons for your girlfriend or boyfriend or whoever. In addition to that, ordering something like a big cappucino or hot chocolate requires me to complete several separate steps, so for the sake of both your and my time management (and the sanity of the other customers), place the more elaborate and time-consuming orders first.

3. Cafe au lait vs Milchkaffee (coffee with milk) - This is actually something that a customer brought up a week or two ago. She ordered a cafe au lait (which is what we technically offer), and then asked me whether or not it was a cafe au lait or just a Milchkaffee (so, just coffee with milk). Now, some of you might be confused because isn't cafe au lait, similar to the latte, also just coffee with milk? Technically yes, but those milk/coffee drinks aren't necessarily interchangeable. Compared to a Milchkaffee, a cafe au lait tends to be a wee bit stronger in the caffeine department and features less milk (foam). Unfortunately for this particular lady, the board might say that we offer cafe au lait, but the machine does not. So, needless to say, she was not happy with her plain coffee with milk...

4. Buttered pretzels and dijon mustard croissants out the wazoo - Now, I will leave it up to you whether or not you take that literally. I know some of you love sploshing and are into feederism and other types of food play (and please, for the love of all that is good and pure and holy, don't Google those terms...if you desperately need to know what they mean/entail, ask me...you might not be able to unsee some of the images that pop up on your screen and I have no money for your therapy bills), no judgment from my end. However, what I actually meant was that one of the perks (and nuisances) of working the late shift and closing up is that I can take home certain baked goods for free. Not all of them mind you (no eclairs or quiches or other items from the patisserie section), but leftover pain au chocolat or dijon mustard croissants are free for the taking at the end of the night. Unfortunately, as fun as that might be on paper, my skin and body in general did not thank me for it. Granted, it didn't really affect the number on the scale, but my skin did become slightly irritated and I was starting to develop cysts and cystic acne again. Besides, I actually started to yearn for fresh fruits and vegetables (or any type of well-balanced meal or a real meal period). So yeah, I'm now learning to only take what I might eat that night after my workout and maybe something for breakfast the next day, but that's it. It might pain me to throw away some of the stuff, but I (and my body) can only take so many refined carbs.

5. Like father, like daughter/History repeats itself - When I think about all of the stuff my father has to do at work, he basically does everything a manager has to do (minus the pay and title). In addition to that, he's also a jack of all trades-type of employee, meaning that he's reliable and competent enough to be "punished"/entrusted with multiple tasks in varying sections of his workplace. Because why ask someone else to do it or learn how to do it when you already have someone who can and who also happens to do it well? Similarly to my previous job (and I'm not counting babysitting assignments), I not only proved myself to be a quick learner (which was surprising both to me and the person who trained me), I also started closing the bakery (and taking over the responsibility of the register) my second week in. Of course, there were a few bumps along the way, but now I'm closing up pretty much all by myself (the boss only comes in for a few minutes to see how things went). However, the moment that it really dawned on me that I am my father's daughter is when I stood in the freezer taking inventory of the week's delivery (those of you who know about my father's job and his tasks there will get why I say that). And I was wearing short sleeves, which is also fairly typical of the guy... It was just an ever so slightly bizarre moment of clarity, but then again, it was very cold in that freezer, so maybe I just spent way too much time in there. And as much as I would like to say that I feel honored to be tasked with so much responsibility (and so quickly), I also feel like I'm being punished (yet again) for being too reliable or good at my job...but someone's gotta do it, right?

Either way, right now I'm just glad to be working and productive in a different way again. Hopefully, I won't be stuck working late shifts all the time, even though I don't think that I'll ever get that lucky... Let's just see how the next four weeks go, shall we?