Some things are too good to be true

Well, as some of you might know, I suffered from a pretty bad cold for about two weeks last month, and was recovering from an exceptionally stubborn cough. This week my body decided it would be nice to add a series of vicious sneezes into the mix. Now, I'm getting the odd feeling that the sneezes might not be from another cold, but an allergy instead. Here's my problem: What the hell am I allergic to?!? I've had these types of sneezes before, but after going through two allergy tests, they weren't able to find anything. Sure, the doctors suggested that I might belong to a group of people who experience allergic reactions through the nasal cavities, but I never went through that kind of an allergy test.
For now, all I can do is take some allergy medication and do my best to find out what I am allergic to. I usually don't like taking allergy medication because it causes practically all of my muscles to relax, which is bad for driving, cleaning, and...gymnastics, among many other activities. Oh well...shikata ga nai ne.
Anyway, I need to shower, take more allergy medication, and think about whether or not I want to go to the movies (and if so, what movie I would like to see).
Hopefully, this will get better soon.

Take care mina san.

I'm done! Yatta! Yatta!

Well, the semester is now officially over for me...and now all I want to do is poke holes in the air or pass out. Unfortunately, I am only granted a brief reprieve since I have to set up a new schedule, look at apartments in Urbana/Champaign/Savoy, pick one, do some major cleaning, find a supplementary job during my "vacation", and fulfill all of the duties that I am usually expected to fulfill.
This semester, like the last, was a disaster. Unlike last semester, it didn't take such a high toll on my already cracked emotional/mental/physical states, which I am quite grateful for. Who knows...maybe by the time I graduate, everything will be the way it was...umm...before 2006, I suppose?
Ah well, enough of my whiny ass. I have a bladder to empty and body to feed. Maybe I can write about something more positive in my next post.

Take care mina san!

A bit of a crisis?

Okay...so I do have something to write about, but I think it is quite stupid, at least part of me does. I just pretty much don't want to be who I am right now. I guess I've reached the point where I want to be wanted in any and every possible way. I want to be desired...probably even lusted after.
The problem with that is, I am not the person others want/desire/lust after. Even my boyfriend has a completely different type of woman he wants...and I get it. It's the same way with almost everybody else, but I have absolutely nothing in common with his fantasy girl...well, other than the being female part. Usually, your partner has at least one attribute in common with your fantasy...
These are the things that at least I think are wrong with me: I am too tall, too heavy, my breasts are too big, my voice is all wrong, my hair is off, and my face in general is just completely wrong. If anything at all, I'm the type of girl you're friends with and you might even consider marrying, but not really one you want.
Sorry, I don't mean to put myself down... I feel especially bad because I promised someone I consider to be very close to me that I wouldn't insult myself, but this just completely overcame me and I don't want something as stupid and silly and vain as this to eat away at me.
So, I would also like to apologize to this close friend of mine for writing this message. You can always lecture me on it later. I'm trying to not insult myself and to not beat myself up, but it's just so damn hard...especially now and I'm not sure why.
Well, I hope everyone is doing okay and I'll try to write a more upbeat message the next time around.

Take care everyone.